Retarded Riders

As a die-hard motorcycle rider, lover and enthusiast, I fully support safety & responsibility while on two wheels. I absolutely hate those morons who do stupid shit and raise the insurance rates for the rest of us.

Today I saw one of those very morons. He almost had a Mazda emblem branded into the side of his head. While on my way home from work, I get near an intersection and this total shit-fer-brains pulls across the highway, that’s right HIGHWAY right in front of me. If I hadn’t been paying attention I’d have nailed him dead on.

Let’s have a little lesson in motorcycle safety, shall we?

When you’re on your motorcycle at an intersection of a major highway, especially one where vehicles are traveling in excess of 60 miles an hour and you need to get across to continue on your ride, you:

1. Wait until traffic is thin enough and far enough apart to safely cross the highway and continue on your way


2. Merge with the flow of traffic and turn around at the next available intersection


3. Realize that you are at a dangerous intersection and find an alternate route


4. Wait until a car (traveling at 70 miles an hour) is 30 yards from you and shoot across traffic without regard to oncoming traffic in either direction

My experienced answer, regardless of how impatient I am, is “1”.

Today’s winner for the Darwin Award chose “4”.

I wish that there was a way to be able to charge idiots like him with the cost of replacing my tires after I locked up the brakes and scrubbed a nice flat spot in them to keep from hitting his stupid ass. To make matters worse, today’s riding genius wasn’t wearing a helmet. Now I fully support peoples’ right to wear or not wear a helmet while riding. I personally don’t wear one when I’m puttering around town but do when I’m hauling ass down the highway. Technically, safety consciousness demands that I always wear a helmet and other proper riding gear. Being an adult and experienced rider, I know my capabilities and limits as well as the capabilities and limits of my bike and therefore can make an informed decision as to how I choose to be attired and ride on a given day.

When I see white trash on two wheels like I did today, especially one who looked to be in his late 40’s to early 50’s (trust me, I got a real good CLOSE look at him) it makes me support laws that require full riding gear at all times. That fuck-head damn near lost his life today and while the world would have been better off without him, that doesn’t change the fact that people should not ride a motorcycle if they are that stupid.

Here’s a fact: If you’re smart enough to earn the money to purchase a motorcycle, smart enough to learn to control and operate said motorcycle, why be a total retard while riding it. If you have a death wish that’s fine. Ride safely until you get away from other people, go up into the mountains and ride off one of them or eat a bullet. But DO NOT ride in a way that puts a bad moniker on responsible riders and puts other riders and cage drivers in harms way.

The sad thing is, this guy scared me & pissed me off so bad today that instead of being glad that I reacted quickly enough to miss him, I wished that I’d bought a new F-250 so that not only would I not really wouldn’t feel the bump when I ran over his stupid ass, but I also wouldn’t damage my vehicle in doing so and could still get back and forth to work on my own.

Remember motorcycle awareness and safety isn’t just for 4 wheeled vehicles. It’s our responsibility as bikers to keep ourselves, and those around us, safe while we ride.

Ride responsible or don’t ride at all.